Manders

Calgon...

2012-02-02T09:15:00.000-08:00

... TAKE ME AWAY.

Dreaming of somewhere tropical.

Somewhere with crystal clear water.

Somewhere with white sand beaches.

Can't believe it has been almost two years since I was taking in the beauty of The Bahamas.

Time for another adventure!

Jamaica? Hawaii? Mexico?

Me Day

2012-02-01T10:48:00.000-08:00

Every once in a while a "Me Day" is not only wanted BUT very necessary. Yesterday was one of those days.

I didn't sleep well the night before. Thanks to Aunt Flo, I was doubled over in pain, feeling like I was going to die (I know, the dramatics of being a female... so glamorous). My heart was feeling broken. I just needed a Me Day, PRONTO. So, I took one! I let work know that I wasn't coming in and I took the day for myself.

I stayed in bed all morning, catching up on Grey's and Parenthood on DVR. Let me tell you, rest REALLY IS the best medicine. Along with the DVR marathon and rest and relaxation time, I got to catch up with my BFF, which is ALWAYS good for the soul. There is something about the words of a BFF to help mend the heart and head.

By noon, I was feeling much more like myself, a bruised and battered version, but like myself nonetheless. I ventured out into the backyard and soaked up some sun while listening to my Heartbroken playlist and reading The Furious Longing of God. Sunshine, fresh air, music that acts as a soundtrack to your emotions, and a good book, I believe, are gifts from God that I am INCREDIBLY thankful for.

As evening approached, I felt even better. I went to the gym for my usual sweat session, which helped in the healing process even further. As they say, running is cheaper than therapy. Don't get me wrong, I think EVERYONE should be in therapy, not necessarily at all times, but chances are, if you think you don't need it, you need it the most. BUT... working out is a good form of therapy. It is time during which you are doing something for YOU, to better YOU... it matters.

All this to say, when was the last time you took a day for YOU? Not necessarily a day off from work, but just a day where you spent the day with yourself, with NO agenda... just to be? If you can't remember the last time, I would encourage you to schedule one ASAP. If you have never taken one, I would encourage you, even further, to schedule one SUPER ASAP. Before you can even think about taking care of someone else, you need to learn how to properly take care of yourself.

Happy Anniversary

2012-01-26T12:52:00.000-08:00

It was one year ago TODAY that I took a stand and decided to do something about my weight.

Going to the gym a couple of times a week while eating my body weight in California Burritos wasn't working anymore. Well, let's be honest... it never worked. I had never dieted. Ever. I had tried to be "more conscious" of what I was eating at one point when I was 21 but that lasted for about a week... MAYBE a week. I just never cared enough to really do something to change.

Being completely honest, I was comfortable in my role as the "funny fat friend". I used every excuse in the book. I said, on MANY occasions that I will "never be a size 2, it isn't how my body is made". I made countless comments about how it is "unhealthy looking to be that skinny" when referring to girls who were simply healthy. I didn't understand why there were so many "skinny" girls at the gym. I had SO MANY mental blocks about my weight and how a healthy lifestyle could work for me.

So, last in December of 2010, I saw a picture of myself that shocked me. I didn't realize just how big I had gotten. Now, don't get me wrong, I am well aware that I wasn't this morbidly obese person but I was big, too big for my body. I decided that I needed to do something, and fast if I wanted any chance at being healthy.

For the first few weeks of January I kept a journal of everything I ate and how many calories I consumed. I didn't have a goal in mind. I didn't really change any of my eating habits. I simply wanted to be aware of what I was eating. To say that I was appalled would be a gross understatement. On any given day, I could consume 3,000 calories or more. I would eat things without blinking an eye. Like I said, I loves me some California Burritos.

I have some very dear friends that have been incredible successful with the Weight Watchers program so I knew enough about it to know that it was something that I could do. I didn't have to buy a certain food. I didn't have to say goodbye to bread (which let's be honest, I am Portuguese, that ain't happening any time soon). I could eat what I want, I just needed to be more mindful of what it was that I was eating.

So, on January 26, 2011, I took the first step toward a healthier (and a much happier) me. I walked into my very first Weight Watchers meeting and I haven't missed a single meeting! Yes, you read that right! EVERY WEDNESDAY, for the past YEAR... I have gone and weighed in at Weight Watchers.

The leader at the meeting that I attend is unbelievable. She is this little spit-fire of a lady with crazy curly hair and more energy than any one person should have. (To be a leader in WW, you have to have been successful with the program yourself.) She shares stories that have helped her to be successful and stories about when it was really hard for her. She helps you to remember that this is a JOURNEY. It takes time but it is SO worth it.

Since joining Weight Watchers I have also become much more intentional with my work out regime. In the beginning it was because I wanted to earn as many activity points as possible and not use them. It was a game for me. :) The game has become a way of life. I work out 5-7 days a week and feel like an absolute sloth if I go more than a day without being active in some way. In August, I got a trainer and I couldn't be more thankful that I have made that investment. Don't get me wrong, it ain't cheap but I can't think of a better way to spend the little disposable income that I do have. I am smaller, stronger, and healthier than I have ever been in my whole life.

So, here I am, a year later... 34.4 pounds lighter and continuing on the journey. There are days when it is ~~a piece of cake~~ ~~a cake walk~~ ~~easy as pie~~ pretty easy and then there are days that are really tough. BUT... everyday is a NEW day. EVERY DAY I get to make the choices necessary to continue on this journey. Again, I will be honest, some days it is really hard to choose well with my eating... Doughnuts and California Burritos are just too good to resist. BUT, that is the beautiful thing about WW... I CAN have those things... but I just have them about once every 6 months, not 4 times a week. :)

2012-01-25T09:15:00.000-08:00

My dear friend Megan has posted this photo on her blog and on instagram this week and it stirred something in me.

This photo has been haunting me. I have been going back to it over and over again to read the words that God spoke.

This morning I read it again and HAD to see how Eugene Peterson translated it in The Message.

Here it is...

This is what God says,
the God who builds a road right through the ocean,
who carves a path through pounding waves,
The God who summons horses and chariots and armies—
they lie down and then can't get up;
they're snuffed out like so many candles:
"Forget about what's happened;
don't keep going over old history.
Be alert, be present. I'm about to do something brand-new.
It's bursting out! Don't you see it?
There it is! I'm making a road through the desert,
rivers in the badlands.
Wild animals will say 'Thank you!'
—the coyotes and the buzzards—
Because I provided water in the desert,
rivers through the sun-baked earth,
Drinking water for the people I chose,
the people I made especially for myself,
a people custom-made to praise me."
Isaiah 43:16-21
The Message

I can't help but be filled with great hope reading that passage!

FORGET ABOUT WHAT'S HAPPENED... BE ALERT, BE PRESENT...
I AM ABOUT TO DO SOMETHING BRAND-NEW.

Amazing.

It is my hope and prayer that this passage stirs something in you the way that it has in me.

Jason Wu for Target

2012-01-18T10:23:00.000-08:00

I am not a label lady.

I don't care what the tags on my tops or jeans say. Of course, I like a good designer pair of jeans or fancy blouse, but I don't care to pay the price.

Ever since the lovely Michelle Obama wore a Jason Wu gown at the Inauguration Ball in 2008, I have been intrigued with his designs.

I love that the styles are feminine, classy, and timeless. I just like his style. :)

This morning I was doing my usual morning routine of checking out the new on MSNBC. I looked through local, national, business, health and entertainment news as normal. I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw THIS headline.

YES, you read that right. JASON WU has a line coming to Target. I might be behind in finding this out but I am one excited lady! I am not planning on going all crazy like some people did for Missoni but I do hope to snag a few pieces.

I am in love with this outfit.

I WANT!

The blouse. The skirt. The bag.

YES PLEASE!!!

Today's post brought to you by Instagram.

2012-01-17T09:19:00.001-08:00

Be Present.

Love the Catalyst theme this year.

Friday night at Splash Wine Bar in North Park.

Started with heels.

Moved on to the foldy flats.

New Round of BodyPump was introduced this weekend.

HURTS SO GOOD!

Work-out courtesy of Pure Barre.

Hydration courtesy of MiiR Bottles

No cavities for this girl.

Most people hate the dentist... I don't.

I saw my friend Megan wear almost this exact outfit while I was in Seattle last April and I have wanted to replicate it since then.

Today, I did.

I have this irrational fear of wasting a good outfit on a mediocre day.

Here's hoping that I run into a good looking man. :)

Happy Happy Birthday to my dear friend Travis.

May this year bring you love, laughter, peace, joy, and contentment.

Honored to call you friend.

Reading Material

2012-01-16T11:42:00.001-08:00

It is no secret that I have become quite the work-out, fitness, and eating right lady. I work out 5-6 days a week. I track everything I eat or drink. It can be exhausting.

Exhausting but so rewarding. I have never felt better. I am smaller, stronger, and healthier than ever before.

As I was straightening my room this morning I came across my stack of recent magazines on my chair and I realized just how fully this transformation has taken over my life. Even my magazines tell the story of my journey to a healthier life.

Risk

2012-01-13T11:13:00.000-08:00

Some things in life require risk.

In fact, MOST things in life require risk.We want this or that but fear keeps us from risking and we in turn stay right where we are. Fear cripples us, even when we know we are strong.

So, let me RISK by being painfully honest in this post. I haven't ~~wanted to~~ ~~been brave enough~~ been willing to really face the reality and put the thoughts into words and onto paper (or in a blog post) for others to read.

It is no secret that I am ready to venture into the dating world and find love.

I will be honest, I thought I was ready when I was 18 and I couldn't have been more wrong. I stood by and watched two close friends get married at 19 and 21 and was so jealous. I didn't understand why my friends got to experience love and I didn't, especially when it was all I ever wanted. I cried many a nights about this. Hindsight being 20/20, I am not so jealous anymore. Both of those friends have experienced love but they have also experienced love lost.

I am still single... and I have mixed emotions about this.

The good stuff...

I am thankful that I have been able to figure out so much about myself without having to think about how my decisions or emotions might affect someone else.
I have been able to move about, only thinking about MY job and MY living situation and packing up MY things.
I have been able to go on trips with friends and to see friends all the while only buying ONE plane ticket.
I have moved half way to Nashville (not one of my prouder moments in life) and didn't have to worry about how the half-way move would affect someone else.
I go to work, go to the gym, go to my weekly Weight Watchers meeting, go to church, hang out with friends... all the while not having to worry about how all of these things might interfere with the schedule of another person.
~~I haven't had my heartbroken.~~ I haven't experienced the pain of being in a relationship and then having someone say, "I don't love you anymore."

The not-so-good stuff...

Getting an invitation to a wedding without a "guest" because your friends know that you are single is just as awful as getting an invitation with a "guest" and not having anyone to take.
Being the 3rd, 5th, and 7th wheels is only fun about 30% of the time.
Having your friends refer to 2012 as "The Year of the Man" is funny the first time and then cuts like a knife... Trust me, I am acutely aware of my singleness, I don't need anyone else to remind me. I appreciate the enthusiasm but sometimes it is just a bit much.
Getting two tickets to a sporting event or concert would be much more exciting if I had a hunky piece of man to take with me. (Yes, I am aware that I just said "hunky piece of man" and how objectifying that statement is. No, I don't care.) Don't get me wrong, I like that I have been able to take lots of friends to do really great things but it would be nice to take a guy. Is it too much to want to listen to Lady Antebellum live with a rugged hot cowboy?! I didn't think so. :)

So, this is where things get tough. This is where RISK comes into play.

I want to go on dates. I want my friends to set me up with their friends (or to even think about setting me up with their friends). I want to meet a cute boy and have the confidence to flirt it up and let him know that I like his style, rather than clamming up like I usually do. I want to have a boyfriend. I want to experience love.

All of those things that I want require RISK. I have allowed fear to cripple me in ways that I am very aware of and in ways that I may never know or understand. I have resisted risk. I will do anything but risk.

I have a crush but I refuse to say anything too forward because I FEAR that I might get rejected. I refuse to risk because of my fear. The reality is, I will continue to simply have a crush as long as I refuse to risk.

The hardest part of all of this is facing the reality that risk is required in life. It is our job to decide whether or not the risk is worth it. We have to decide if we are willing to jump in and risk whatever it is that we are risking to gain what we think we may want. Is my crush worth the risk? If he is worth it, I will jump in and risk. If he isn't, I won't. And the even harder truth is that I may never know if he is worth it if I don't risk.

Risk is hard. REALLY hard.

BUT

RISK IS NECESSARY!

We MUST risk in order to stretch and grow and become and feel and be.

Here's to 2012 and taking RISKS.

Let it be said that it took great RISK in clicking the PUBLISH button for this post. Letting you all read this is RISKY!

January 12, 2012

2012-01-12T08:17:00.000-08:00

right now I am...

watching... The leaves dance in the wind outside of my office window.

eating... Nothing. Though, my breakfast is waiting for me. The usual... Strawberries, Greek Yogurt, 1/3 cup of Granola and a banana.

drinking... water.

wearing... Tan Flats with gold embellishments. Light Jeans. Tan Cami. Blue Chiffon top with ruffles. Grey Pea coat.

avoiding... Paperwork.

feeling... Thankful. Hopeful. Lonely but not alone.

missing... My far away friends. Some dear friends are celebrating birthdays in Seattle this weekend and next weekend, and I wish I could be there to celebrate with them. I haven't been in Arizona in almost a year, which is a LONG time for me. I haven't been to Nashville in almost 4 years, which is just out of control. Needless to say, I am missing my friends that don't live in SD.

thankful... For SO much. I am thankful for a job that has some amazing hours and that provides for me financially. It isn't my dream job, but it isn't a terrible "mean-time" job either. I am thankful for my freighbors. I am thankful that the amphitheater season is going to start in a few months, CAN'T WAIT! I am thankful for cheesy love songs (and break up songs too). I have A LOT to be thankful for.

weather... LOVE IT TODAY! Finally a little cloudy and chilly! Actually feels like a San Diego winter!

praying... For continued recovery for my aunt. For my dream job. For freedom for a dear friend. For love. For babies (not for me). For introspection. Against cancer. For clarity.

needing... I started to write a few things but then I realized that they are WANTS not NEEDS. In all honestly, I don't NEED anything. (Add that to the list of things that I am thankful for.)

thinking... That my toes have lost feeling because they are so cold. About a boy. About traveling. About my friends. Thinking about a lot...

dreaming... Of the Bahamas or anywhere tropic really. It has been almost 2 years since Chelsea and I ventured to the Bahamas so it must be time for another trip! I am thinking JAMAICA this time! :)

loving... Tide Sport with Febreze. Let's be real people, Gym Clothes can get a certain STANK to them that just doesn't go away with a normal detergent. TIDE SPORT WORKS! My clothes not only DON'T stink but they smell so good, even after a two and a half hour work out like the one I did on Tuesday! It is amazing!

And you? What are you up to?

MERRY CHRISTMAS

2011-12-25T11:25:00.000-08:00

For unto us a Child is born,

Unto us a Son is given;

And the government will be upon His shoulder.

And His name will be called

Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God,

Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Isaiah 9:6

Christmas Card Photoshoot 2011

2011-12-21T14:34:00.000-08:00

By now, most of you should have received my Christmas card in the mail. There are a few of you that will be getting it in the mail in the coming days, but most of you have received it, thus the blog post.

As some of you know, I work for a nationwide Photography company called (once like a spark). If you happen to be, or anyone you know, is looking for a wedding photographer, check us out. I promise you won't be disappointed. Tracy, is our San Diego photographer and I just love her. It has been so much fun to get to know her and work with her in spreading the OLAS love in SD. When it came time to get my pictures done for this year's card, I knew I could count on Tracy to make me look good. :)

Tracy and I (along with sweet Katelynn) met in Little Italy and got to work. I had a BLAST! Here are some of the photos...

Got a fever...

2011-12-14T09:05:00.000-08:00

BIEBER FEVER.

And I don't want any meds to get rid of it either!

Recently

2011-12-12T13:38:00.000-08:00

Katelynn finally LIVES in San Diego!

Chargers game with Lisa. Terrible seats, as you can tell! :)

Sweet Jackson!

I loves me some TWals.

Livin for the weekend...

2011-12-12T11:58:00.000-08:00

So, I am a big ol nerd and couldn't wait to get home from work and working out on Friday so I could address and send out my Christmas cards. (I know, I know... I need to get me a man. If you know of any attractive single men who love Jesus and football, send them my way. Seriously though.)

Alas, I went straight to the gym after work on Friday and then went home to gather all of my supplies for my Christmas card addressing extravaganza. I headed off to Panera to sit by the fire with some Christmas music in my ears and a green pen in hand. I did about half of the cards there before heading to Casa Harvey to finish the rest of them there. I have said it before, and I will say it again, I am so thankful for the Harvey family. I love that their house is a second home to me. Kyle and Cody are like brothers to me, and I wouldn't trade them for the world. Jim and Teresa are some of the best pseudo parents a girl could ask for. I sat at the counter, addressing my stack of cards while laughing about anything and everything. We joked about how single I am to be addressing Christmas cards with my best friend's parents on a Friday night (while my best friend lives in Washington). It was just a good night.

Saturday, I woke up and did some crafts. I decided to make all of my Christmas gifts this year and am so glad that I made that decision. Anyone receiving a gift from me is getting a gift with lots of thought and love put into it. I have thoroughly enjoyed getting to spend so much time in making these gifts. After craft time came some much needed time with my dear friend Chelsea.

Chelsea is one of those friends that I will have in my life forever, without a doubt in my mind. We have traveled together every year for the past 4 years and have made some of the best memories. Chelsea was someone that was really there for me when my dad died, and again when my grandpa died. We laugh about what life looked like a few years ago, what it looks like now, and about what it is going to look like in the future. Chelsea and I spent the day doing everything and nothing at the same time. The long and short of it, we just spent the day together and it was life giving. I am forever thankful for my friend Chelsea.

To top off an already stellar weekend, my friend from MiiR were in San Diego for the Flood Holiday Shoppe. My friend Bryan is the founder of this great company and one of my very favorite people Travis works there full-time. We spent the better part of yesterday slinging water bottles, all the while catching up and laughing about life. Again, this time was life-giving.

As I drove home last night (at 10:45, WAY past my bedtime) I couldn't help but turn off my radio and pray. I HAD to say Thank-You. I had to praise the One whom has given me so much to be thankful for. My heart felt an urgency to say Thank-You for the Harvey Family, Chelsea, June, Bryan, Travis, Ryan, Charity, Amber and Lauren, Patrick and Lacey, Ken and Elaine, Marissa and Weston, Deena, and so many others. I have so many people in my life that love me and have journeyed so many different parts of life with me. My cup truly runneth WAY over.

To say the least, it wasn't hard to wake up with a smile on my face and a hop in my step this morning. My heart is full.

Dear Santa

2011-12-07T10:55:00.001-08:00

Dear Santa,
I am pretty sure that I made the nice list this year.
Here is my wish-list, in no particular order...

Both the movie on DVD and Justin Timberlake.

My MacBook is getting to be SUPER slow on the upkeep... a new one would be nice.

I have coveted this watch since it caught my eye that fateful day in Nordstrom over a year ago.

As with Friends with Benefits, I would like the DVD or Ryan Gosling... whichever is easier to get.

I NEED this DVD in my library. NEED it!

I have wanted a NorthFace Denali Fleece jacket since my freshman year of college at SPU. It is safe to say that I was one of VERY few people in Seattle without a NorthFace jacket. I want one SO BAD!

I would be EVER SO THANKFUL to find any of these treasures under my tree on Christmas morning. Oh and one more thing... a husband would be nice too. :)

Love,

Manders

Two Years Ago...

2011-11-27T08:13:00.001-08:00

Two years ago, at this very moment, I was at Sharp hospital sitting in an uncomfortable chair at the end of a hospital bed, watching and waiting. We gathered at the hospital, knowing that my dad only had a few more hours. I felt, and still feel, a number of emotions. I couldn't say much, and still can't. I just sat there, watching my dad.

I watched my dad take his last breath at just 51 years old. I was 24, and my dad was dead. Gone.

My dad and I didn't have much of a relationship. My dad made lots of decisions that ultimately led me to making the decision to not have him in my life. People have disagreed with that decision, but it wasn't up to anyone else, it was my decision to make.

I feel like a lot of people disregarded the loss of my father because he wasn't in my life. People seemed to have had this thought that since my dad wasn't in my life, it wasn't much of a loss. Let me tell you, those people were and still are wrong. To be honest, I don't know if losing my dad after not having a relationship with him makes it harder or easier.

Since my dad and I didn't have much of a relationship, his death was somewhat of an answer to a lot of questions that I had. I always wondered if my dad would actually show up to my wedding and if he did, would he be drunk. I wondered if I would even want to do the father-daughter dance with my dad. I wondered if my dad would actually show up when he said he would. I wondered if my dad would call on the holidays or on my birthday.

On the other hand... My future husband doesn't get to ask my dad for my hand in marriage. I will never get to have my dad walk me down the aisle to meet my groom at the alter. I don't get to do the father-daughter dance with my dad at my wedding reception. These are two of the hardest parts of a wedding for me. I cry every time either one of those things happen. My kids don't get to know their grandpa.

My dad is gone.

Needless to say, today is an emotional day.

November 24

2011-11-24T21:29:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving!

Without further ado... the final installment of things that I am thankful for.

1. I am thankful that I got to start today with some great friends doing a 5k.
2. I am thankful for naps on the couch.
3. I am thankful for my sweet Grandma Brown. I am thankful that she continues to host the whole family (even with 4 kids and their spouses gone, we still had almost 30 people) for holidays and special occasions. I am thankful that she has instilled in us a deep sense of value for family and tradition. I am thankful that she is a no BS kind of lady. I am thankful to call her Grandma. I am thankful to get to spend so much time with her.
4. I am thankful that my sister and brother-in-law have two happy and healthy boys. I am thankful that I get to be their Tia, and spoil them.
5. I am thankful for the families that, year after year, invite me to spend the holidays with them and just love on me. I am thankful that these people care about me and my hurts and pains. I am thankful that they have been there for me through so much.

I will be honest, today was a really tough day. I cried a lot. Even though I have a lot to be thankful for, the holidays are really hard. I try to keep a good balance of feeling what I need to feel while still staying thankful and moving on with life. Sometimes, life is tough. Today, it was tough.

November 23

2011-11-23T19:36:00.000-08:00

As much as it pains me to say, literally, I am so thankful for my trainer. He gets me. He knows when to push me and when I really can't do any more. Because of him and his pushing, I am stronger than I have ever been, and walk with more confidence than I ever have.

Today, I had the BEST session with him to date. I did more push-ups than I thought possible, and then did even more. I did more reps than asked. I stayed in plank position longer than told. He pushed me and I pushed myself. Such a good feeling.

Moving on to sweeter things, literally...

I am so thankful for my annual Pie-Baking time at Casa Harvey. The Harveys have been so kind as to make me part of their family for the past 11 years or so. For the past few years, I have gone over to Casa Harvey the day before Thanksgiving to bake some pies. I LOVE IT! Teresa and I always drag Cody in to help us and we listen to Christmas music (before Thanksgiving) and just enjoy the time.

I am just very Thankful today.

And now, I get to go celebrate someone that I am VERY thankful for at a place that I am thankful to get to bring my friends to. :)

November 22

2011-11-22T22:52:00.000-08:00

First and foremost, I am thankful for my health. I went to have a physical done this morning and the doctor informed me that I couldn't be healthier, which made me VERY happy and incredibly thankful! Along with that, I am thankful that I have health insurance so I can go in for a physical and only pay 10 dollars. (I am not thankful for the 3 shots that I had to get, but I am thankful that they are available to me to help prevent the Flu and other diseases.)

I am thankful for the deliciousness that is Dumpling Inn, and the great company for lunch today. I could say A LOT about the people that I went to lunch with and how I am thankful for them but I am saving that for another post. :)

I am thankful for my recent renewed love of all things crafty. I am on a mission to make all of my Christmas gifts this year. Here are some items that I have made so far...

November 21

2011-11-21T21:08:00.000-08:00

I am thankful for a good sweat session at the gym.

Ran a practice 5K, in preparation for Thursday morning, and I didn't hate it. My new playlist certainly helped to make it go much more quickly.

Never underestimate the power of these two things...
1. A good run and the feeling you get when it is done.
2. A new playlist and the energy it gives you to get through the run.

Thankful. :)

November 20

2011-11-20T20:21:00.000-08:00

I am thankful for days like today...

Church. Breakfast with June. Hearing June yell "I'm NOT ready!" in response to the Christmas decor at Michael's. Cheering on the 3-Day Walkers. Meeting Eric's parents at El Camino. Crafts. Rain.

Who wouldn't love today?!

November 19

2011-11-19T23:52:00.000-08:00

Today, and everyday really, I am thankful for my friend Katelynn.

Katelynn recently moved to San Diego (a week ago to be exact) and I could not be more thrilled about this! Life is just so much more fun when Katelynn is around. No seriously, this girl brings some joy to the world (Christmas pun intended).

Today, Katelynn and I planned on reading in the park and just enjoying living in the same city. My sister ended up needing me to watch the boys so she could go take care of some stuff at work, and Katelynn was kind enough to go with me. My nephew Parker LOVES Katelynn... as you can see from the picture below.

Parker NEVER wanted to nap with his Tia... but Katelynn comes around and he is ALL about it. I pray for my sister and brother-in-law, Parker is already a lady killer it is gonna be intense later in life if he keeps this up! :)

After spending the day with my precious nephews we ventured down to the Family Bar for some KARAOKE! You know I loves me some Karaoke! :) I sang 3 songs and Katelynn didn't sing at all, well she sang from her seat and she wouldn't have had it any other way.

Katelynn is just good people. She is a direct reflection of her mom and dad, who are two of the most incredible people. I am so thankful that Katelynn is here and I can't wait for the many adventures to come! :)

If...

2011-11-19T19:28:00.001-08:00

...I had pipes like this girl, I would NEVER stop singing. I would sing everything that came out of my mouth.

UNREAL!!!

Replay

2011-11-19T19:26:00.001-08:00

I have this video on replay....

November 18

2011-11-18T19:01:00.000-08:00

Another list of things that I am thankful for...

1. I am SO SO SO SO SO thankful that today was the last day of work until the 28th! HELLO BIG perk of working for the school system... LOTS of breaks!

2. I am thankful that I have learned to push myself at the gym. My mantra is this: YOU CAN DO ANYTHING FOR A MINUTE. I went to the gym this evening (on my rest day, might I add) and set out to do 45 minutes on the stairclimber. I am acutely aware that 45 minutes of anything at the gym is a long time, let along the stairclimber. BUT, I love it. At minute 30, I was so ready to throw in the towel (literally and figuratively) but I said, out loud, "YOU CAN DO ANYTHING FOR A MINUTE" and I kept going. I took it one minute at a time. I made it the full 45 minute and felt like an absolute CHAMPION when I was done.

3. I am thankful for nights like tonight when I have NO obligations and get to be at home and in bed at a time that most of my students are in bed.

Yup... that's all for now. I am a thankful lady. :)

November 17

2011-11-17T20:44:00.001-08:00

Working at a school, I get the great pleasure (errr DISPLEASURE) of taking School Pictures every year. Yup, you know the ones. PICTURE DAY! YAYYYYYYY!

We got our pictures back yesterday and I couldn't help but want to compare this year's picture to last year's picture. I will be honest, I was shocked at what I saw. I am acutely aware of the amount of weight that I have lost. My wardrobe is COMPLETELY different from even 5 months ago, let alone a year ago. The scale says a VERY different number from last September and more than that, I feel like a different person from last September.

I am healthier. I am stronger. I am smaller. I FEEL better.

Check out the pictures...

September 2010

September 2011

And side by side so you can see just how different the two pictures are...

So today, I am thankful for the journey that I have been on. I am thankful that I am a happier and healthier me than I was a year ago. I am thankful that I have made my health a priority. I am thankful that I have spent LOTS AND LOTS of hours in the gym and running the streets of San Diego. I am thankful that I have invested in having a trainer who helps to push me further than I would ever push myself. I am thankful that, for the first time in my life, I am aware of what I am putting in my body. I am thankful that I haven't quit, even when it the scale has remained in the same 5 pound range for months. I am thankful that I have committed to going to weekly Weight Watchers weigh-ins and meetings. I am thankful that I haven't missed a single Wednesday weigh-in since starting on January 26, 2010. I am thankful for all of the people who have supported me emotionally and even financially on this journey. I am thankful for the people who have told me that I am an inspiration to them, as it has helped to keep my going. I am thankful that I have stuck with this.

I am thankful!

November 16

2011-11-16T09:42:00.001-08:00

It isn't even 10am and I can already list off a few things that I am thankful for...

1. Not to make the announcement before Michelle but I gotta say it... I am SO SO SO thankful that while Michelle was here for Amanda and Tyler's wedding, she went in for an in-person interview with Invisible Children. SHE GOT THE JOB!!! We are slowly but surely getting the 4E Ashton crew all to San Diego. Rochelle, YOU'RE NEXT!! I am so so so thankful that we will get to have Michelle in San Diego!

2. My co-worker brought in some old Jamba Juice giftcards for me because she knows I like me a good smoothie. She said, oh they probably together make $5. UMMMM try over $25!! I asked her if she wanted them back and she said NO, KEEP THEM! Um, hello BLESSING!

3. I am thankful that my friend Katelynn has MOVED to San Diego. It is so nice to have her here to go to the gym with, to WW with, and to just HANG OUT with.

4. I feel really cute today. Straight hair, good make up application, a cute outfit... never underestimate the power of feeling cute.

So, there you have it... 4 things that I am thankful for, all before 10am. :)

November 15

2011-11-15T21:05:00.000-08:00

Today, I am thankful for my friend and gym buddy Jessica.

I am thankful that we are able to talk about what the Lord is doing in our lives, the fun and not so fun stuff, and just all that is going on in life. It is just so nice to have someone to go to the gym with and even more than that, it is nice to have someone who has lived a similar story.

I am thankful for Jessica.

November 14

2011-11-14T20:59:00.001-08:00

I am thankful for my new found love for the stair-climber at the gym.

I wear a grey shirt on purpose so I can see just how much I sweat while working it out. I know it is gross and pretty unattractive but I don't care... I LOVE seeing the sweat of my labor. :)

I am thankful for the amount of calories that I am able to burn in 45 minutes.

November 13

2011-11-13T20:53:00.000-08:00

Today, I am thankful for days at home.

As much as I love being busy and doing lots of fun and exciting things, I also love my time at home with nothing and no one to answer to.

There are few things that are better than a enjoying a QUIET day in a clean room with a good book/movie/show. Today was PERFECT!

I stole this from Eric...

2011-11-12T16:55:00.001-08:00

You can purcahse it here...

November 12

2011-11-12T16:01:00.001-08:00

I am so thankful that Lisa and Bryan are FINALLY living in San Diego. Whenever Bryan and Lisa would be home visiting from Indianapolis, we would just dream about what it would be like when they FINALLY got to San Diego. I gotta tell you, we are REALLY enjoying being in the same city finally!

A little background...
Lisa and I met our freshman year of college at SPU, where we lived down the hall from one another. We instantly bonded over the fact that we were both from San Diego. Even though I left SPU after just one year, it was easy to keep in touch for two reasons; one, Lisa is just that awesome and two, we live in the same city. Lisa finished out her undergrad at SPU while I did the seven college tour before finishing at San Diego Christian College. During Lisa's junior year, she met Bryan, IN AN AIRPORT! That's right ladies, she met her husband in a freaking airport. Hello Lifetime movie! Lisa got accepted to dental school (she is a dentist, don't mess) in Indianapolis so after SPU, she headed to Indy to continue her studies. Bryan eventually joined her out there. They got engaged and then threw a FANTASTIC wedding and returned to Indy to finish school. Lisa graduated in May and they moved to San Diego in August.

Here are some pictures from their wedding almost two and a half years ago...

From the moment I met Bryan (at their wedding) I knew that it was just so right. Lisa is one of those people who is just so easy to be around. We can talk about everything and nothing all at the same time. A shopping trip to Target is so much more fun with her along for the ride. Bryan is one of those husbands that you don't mind having around. Of course, girl time is always needed, but we don't mind when Bryan hangs out too!

Last night, Lisa and I had planned on making dinner and just hanging out at their place. (They live downtown in this awesome condo... perfect location!) Bryan usually goes out with some co-workers on Friday after work so we figured we would have a girl's night. Bryan's co-workers weren't around so it turned into the three of us, and it was perfect! We had a delicious dinner at home with some Skinny Girl Sangria and then we headed out to the SHOUT! House. You see, Lisa and I are generally in bed pretty early so going out was a BIG deal. We always joke around that we are grandmas. Well, not last night! We had a great time singing along to songs and people watching for hours. It was perfect!

I am just so glad that Lisa and Bryan are in San Diego, and not just for a holiday or wedding... they LIVE here. Here are a few pictures from last night...

November 11

2011-11-11T16:56:00.000-08:00

First of all, I am thankful for all of the veteran's out there who are fighting or who have fought for the freedoms that we take for granted everyday. THANK YOU.

Today, I am also thankful for the smooth sweet voice of Zac Brown, especially while singing Georgia on My Mind with Greg Allman. UNBELIEVABLE.

I may or may not watch this video over and over again...

November 10

2011-11-10T23:40:00.000-08:00

Today, I am thankful that people change.

You see, in High School, I wasn't the most pleasant person to be around. Don't get me wrong, I had a lot of friends and was super involved, but people put up with A LOT from me. I was a new believer and was quite over-zealous in my belief. I sat in History class and told people they were going to hell for their politics, sexual orientation, or just general disposition. I was quite holier than though, if you know what I am saying.

Side-note: If you are reading this and you are one of those people that I said that to, I AM SO SORRY. I was wrong. I was wrong to judge you. I was wrong to think that I was better than you. I was wrong in so many ways. I am sorry for the hurt that I may have caused you. I am sorry that I said and did what I said and did. If you are reading this and I wasn't the person to say that to you, but someone once did, let me apologize on their behalf.

Beyond my Bible-thumping ways, I was just a hurting person. I had A LOT of hurt in my life that I didn't know how to articulate, and wasn't ready to articulate. I was just a BARREL of fun. These ways followed me to my freshman year at SPU. I wasn't as bad at SPU, but I was also among "my people". I was at a school with people who, supposedly, believed the same things that I did. I didn't tell anyone that they were going to hell, but I was still a hormonal girl with a lot of hurt.

Tonight, I went out on the town to celebrate my friend Eric's birthday. Eric and I met our freshman year at SPU when we both lived on 4th Ashton. Eric is just good people. When I left SPU, we lost touch but reconnected when he moved to SD to go to grad school at USD. Having Eric in SD has been an absolute blast. Seriously, he is FUN.

Someone that I went to High School with is in Eric's program at USD, and he came out last night too. I was nervous to see him, as I am generally pretty nervous to see anyone that I went to High School with because I am not the same person and want to be seen for who I am NOW, not who I was 10 years ago. Thankfully, he saw me for who I am now.

I am thankful that we change. I am thankful that when we acknowledge the garbage in our life and throw it out, life gets cleaner. Don't get me wrong, life is still a mess, but it just doesn't stink like rotten emotion anymore.

I hope all of this makes sense... It is kind of verbal diarrhea. :)

Fever

2011-11-10T16:49:00.001-08:00

And I mean the Bieber kind!

I love me some Bieber, I just do.

I also love love love love this rendition of Baby...

November 9

2011-11-09T20:00:00.000-08:00

Today, I am thankful for the wonderful invention of dry cleaning.

Now, if you know me at all, you know that I am not a fancy lady. I don't wear dresses unless it is to a wedding, funeral, or event during which I am told that a dress is appropriate. I am most comfortable in a good pair of jeans (By "good pair", let me say that I am currently addicted to The Diva from Old Navy, especially when they are on sale for $19. What can I say, they make my butt look good... or so I have been told.). I have recently discovered my love for blouses and their ability to instantly dress up a pair of jeans.

Before the school year started I did a little "Back-to-School" shopping, especially since A LOT of my clothes didn't fit me anymore. (GOOD Problem to have!) I went to my usual places of Old Navy and Target and even stopped into Ross and Marshall's. As you can tell, I am quite the big spender on clothes. (Note the sarcasm.)

I bought a BEAUTIFUL blouse from Marshall's, for way more than I would normally spend on ANY article of clothing, let alone a blouse, but I LOVED it, so I decided to bite the bullet and buy the blouse. To my dismay, I wore the blouse and when I went to put it in the wash, I read the tag and saw the dreaded words, DRY CLEAN ONLY! WHAT?!?!? I NEVER buy anything that is dry clean only (which is easy to do when you shop where I shop). I literally stood in my tracks and didn't know what to do. Sad, but true.

This weekend I wore my new favorite green green dress and may or may not have spilled a little something on it during dinner. (As I write this blog I am thinking that I may need to take some etiquette classes or How To Be a Lady classes.) The dress didn't require dry-cleaning (again, it is from Old Navy) but since I love it so much, I wanted to be sure to get the stains taken care of properly.

Alas, to the Dry-Cleaner I went. And, to no surprise of anyone else, it worked. Stains, GONE. Blouse, fresh and clean.

So, as ridiculous as this is, I am thankful for the nice people at Mr. J's Dry Cleaning. :)

November 8

2011-11-08T14:25:00.000-08:00

I am feeling less than stellar today. I have a hacking cough that hurts real deep and my nose seems to think that it is a faucet. Today, I am thankful for the things that are helping to keep me on my feet...

My trusty green MiiR with water...

I typically stick to Luden's Cherry "cough drops", you know, the ones that taste like candy? This time, I decided to be the adult that my age tells me that I am and get a cough drop that will actually do it's job. Alas, Halls. Bleh!

Puffs with Vicks are my absolute FAVORITE tissue when I have a cold or any sort of sickness. If you haven't used these yet, you are missing out. SERIOUSLY. I might be obsessed.

Here's to hoping that tomorrow I am thankful that my cold is gone! :)

Circa 2003

2011-11-07T14:31:00.000-08:00

Seeing as how I have spent the past 6 days with people from my freshman year of college at SPU, I couldn't help but go through the archives of photos to pull out some classics from my time at SPU. I hope this makes you laugh as much as it did me...

November 7

2011-11-07T12:15:00.000-08:00

I am accutely aware that some people are reading this blog from places that really are "freezing" and "below freezing" and just plain "effing cold". Yes, I know that San Diego doesn't get "that" cold. BUT San Diego does get cold. Going even further, my room is an ice box.

Last night, I had one of those nights where I went to sleep with flannel PJ pants and a hooded sweatshirt on and was still kicking my legs to create some heat between my sheets and under my fluffy down comforter. At some point in the night I was down to just my under-roos and a tank top. Needless to say, I apparently got hot and stripped in my sleep. I am not sure how long I lasted before I woke up at 3:30 shivering again, only to put back on all of those layers; the layers didn't last terribly long this time around either.

Alas, it is clearly time to bust out the flannel sheets and Grandma and Grandpa's afghan to warm up my sleeps.

Today, I am thankful for my flannel sheets. I am thankful for the afghan that my Grandma gave me last year. I am thankful that I have a comfortable bed, a roof over my head, and a place to call home and stay warm (even when it is "cold") every night.

November 6

2011-11-06T08:16:00.000-08:00

I am BEYOND thankful for the great time that was had at Amanda and Tyler's wedding last night. Those two really know how to throw a party. I am especially thankful for Usher's Yeah and the song's ability to get a party started. White people love to get down to some Usher. (Don't act like you are above busting out a dance move when Yeah comes on the radio... I know better than you believe that you are above that!)

Here are some pictures from yesterday...

Congrats Mr. and Mrs. Wolfe!!

November 5

2011-11-05T11:35:00.000-07:00

Today, I am thankful that I started a journey to health almost a year ago.

Getting ready to put on a dress and go to a wedding is A LOT more fun when you feel comfortable and confident in your own skin. Not feeling the necessity to constantly wear spanx under every dress or feeling like I have to wear black to be more slimming is a freedom like I never knew before.

I am thankful that I get to put on my new GREEN dress with NO spanx and feel like a million bucks.

November 4

2011-11-04T16:33:00.000-07:00

Today, I am thankful for the rain.

Don't get me wrong, Rainy Day Schedule isn't my favorite, but it is worth it! The rain makes it feel a little like fall. I just love it!

November 3

2011-11-03T22:08:00.000-07:00

Today, I am thankful for 30% off coupons!

I bought a dress for Amanda and Tyler's wedding that I love but it is just a little too short for me. It isn't short, but it is short for ME. Alas, I was back on the hunt for a dress for their wedding on SATURDAY. I have my "go-to" dress that I wear to weddings but it happens to be the EXACT same color of the Bridesmaids dresses. Not just the same color group... it would look like I was a disgruntled girl who wanted to be a Bridesmaid but didn't make the cut. So, wearing that dress wasn't an option.

I have been eyeing a dress at Old Navy for a couple of weeks now, but the tag read $39.94. If you know me at all, you know that I RARELY EVER buy clothes at full price. Seeing as how I do most of my clothes shopping at Old Navy and Target, I just wait a week or two for it to hit the clearance rack. :)

I got an e-mail letting me know about the 30% friends and family deal that is currently going on, so I decided to go try on the dress, knowing that if I loved it I would get 30% off.

Well, I tried it on, and I LOVED IT!! I took my freighbor with me and we both decided that it fit perfectly, and was just a REALLY GOOD dress for me. I was in love. At that moment, $27.98 for a dress was totally worth it.

BUT

THE DRESS WAS ON SALE!!! The dress was on sale for $24.94! I was in business mode and just grabbed the dress without looking at the sale sign.

So.... The dress was $17.46!!!

So, today, I am thankful for 30% off coupons!!!

November 2

2011-11-02T23:28:00.000-07:00

Today, a group of ladies gathered from Chicago, Seattle, Spokane, and San Diego to celebrate our sweet friend Amanda becoming a bride on Saturday. We went to Cafe Sevilla to sip some tasty Sangria, shower the bride with goodies for the bedroom (which are more for the groom, let's be honest) and just enjoy time with each other.

Most of us met in the fall of 2003 when we all ventured to Seattle Pacific University for freshman year of college. Lisa, Amanda, Rochelle, Michelle, Carley and I all lived on 4E Ashton. I moved after a quarter but remained close to these ladies. Lisa, Amanda and I instantly bonded over the fact that we are all from San Diego. We would help each other through the dark days on Seattle's winter. We held each other and prayed as we watched news of the 2003 wildfires. We laughed as Lisa fell down Ashton hill in the rain (and we still laugh about this). Michelle helped me to stay focused on school work when all I wanted to do was be social. Carley has the sweetest demeanor about her, making everyone feel safe. Rochelle brings joy to ANY situation... she is just hilarious!

I am thankful for my short-lived time in Seattle. Though I was only there September-June, I made some of the best friends a girl can ask for. I am thankful that SPU was a place that we all called home for a season. I am thankful that through seasons of life; marriages, babies, moving, job changes, and joys and sorrows, we have remained friends.

November 1

2011-11-01T21:12:00.000-07:00

Today starts 24 days of things that I am thankful for. I love these blogs and just the time that I take to really think about the things that I am thankful for at this moment in life... I really should do this more often than just in November. In fact, maybe I will do Thankful Thursdays regularly?! (Note to self... set a reminder in the calendar to do that!) :)

Day 1
I am thankful for this season of thankfulness. I love that we are forced to slow it down a bit and think about the things that bring joy and peace to our lives. I am thankful that Honest Abe (President Lincoln) declared Thanksgiving a holiday that should be celebrated every year in November (and let us note that he did this in the midst of the Civil War).

What are you thankful for today?

Our God

2011-10-30T20:44:00.001-07:00

Can't stop listening to this and singing this at the top of my lungs in my car...

Sara B does it again

2011-10-15T09:51:00.000-07:00

If you didn't watch to the very end, you missed out.

HILARIOUS!

Betty White

2011-10-04T17:14:00.001-07:00

Ro-Dizzle...

2011-10-03T08:24:00.000-07:00

FOR SHIZZLE!

Today, is a VERY special day.

Today, is Ro-Dizzle's birthday! Ro-Dizzle (Rosie) is one of my absolute best friends in the world. If you have read this blog long enough, you have read the story of Rosie and I and the fact that she didn't like me in the beginning. I don't blame her for that though ha ha ha ha. Rosie and I are very different yet have A LOT in common. I cherish Rosie's friendship more than she will ever know!

Today, I have to say a BIG Thank-you to Jan and John for making the decision to pro-create once more after Heffer to have Ro. So...

Jan and John.... Mama and Papa Maxin, THANK YOU! Thank you for having Ro. Thanks for raising her. Thanks for putting her in a laundry basket on top of the dryer when she was a crying baby. Thanks for always telling her that Jeff is the favorite. Thanks for giving her the sense of humor and zeal for life that she has! Without the laundry basket and countless comments about Heffer being the favorite, she wouldn't be who she is today.

Even more than thanking Jan on John, gotta give it up to my Ro-Dizz.

Rosie- Words can't describe how thankful I am for you. Your friendship means the world to me. You let me sleep in your bed while you took the couch when I was visiting Seattle when all you wanted was your bed after being away at APU. You loaded up your green Carola with all of my crap and drove me from San Diego to Seattle for my first year of college. You let me call your family my family while in Seattle, and still today. We have talked about EVERYTHING in the world, with lots of laughter and tears, sometimes tears from laughter. You are a rock in my life, and I am eternally thankful. I am so excited to be Tia to sweet Lu, can't wait for her to finally be here!!! I love you Ro.

Happy Birthday!

Calling

2011-09-30T13:14:00.001-07:00

I had to steal this from my friend Michelle...

“What I know for sure: There is no greater gift you can give or receive than to honor your calling. It’s why you were born. And how you become most truly alive.” - Oprah

So good!!!

THANKS MICHELLE, for letting me steal from you. :)

GIVE

2011-09-26T08:08:00.000-07:00

Everybody's reachin' for something
Every day pullin' and tugging
And always wantin' a little more
Holdin' on to hurt like an anchor
Treatin' those we love like strangers
Takin' names and keeping score
We all know, what we're really after
Somewhere along the road, we got it backwards

If you want to get love then give it
If you want to feel some forgiveness
Then you’ve gotta let go and do some forgiving of your own
If you want a friend then be one
A little bit of kindness, show some
You’ll be surprised of how much finds its way back home
It don’t matter what it is
If you want it, give.

I been down right stubborn,
At one time or another,
And found it easier to bend.
I've had a shoulder to lean on
Been the one who got to be strong
And peace was waiting at both ends
I've felt the power, I've seen what it can do
It's seemed so simple, so simple that it's true

If you want to get love then give it
If you want to feel some forgiveness
Then you’ve gotta let go and do some forgiving of your own
If you want a friend then be one
A little bit of kindness, show some
You’ll be surprised of how much finds its way back home
It don’t matter what it is
If you want it, give.

If you want a friend then be one
A little bit of kindness show some
You’ll be surprised of how much finds its way back home
It don’t matter what it is
If you want it, give.

Ever since I saw Leann perform this song on the America's Got Talent finale, I have had the song on repeat. Such truth...

Time to Up the Ante

2011-09-23T14:18:00.000-07:00

So, it is no secret that I have had great success with the Weight Watchers program. I have lost and have maintained that loss. I feel amazing.

When school went back into session, I knew that it was time for me to up the ante again with the Weight Watchers program and with the work out regime. In that, I spent some time house-sitting this summer and decided early on that I would invest that money into a personal trainer. Little did I know, I would become addicted.

My trainer isn't easy. He laughs at me when I try to quit before he tells me that I am done with the reps and then makes me do more. I often tell him that I hate him... that just makes him smile knowing that he is doing his job.

I feel strong. I feel muscles that I always knew were there but never knew worked. I feel good. I feel really good.

I am so glad that I decided to up the ante. So glad.

Big dreams in small realities

2011-09-19T08:53:00.000-07:00

If you have read this blog for any length of time, you know that I love me some Natalie Closner. That girl write the songs of a 20 something lady's heart. TRUST ME. SO DANG GOOD!

Well, she recently wrote and released a song that has a line about "fitting big dreams in small realities". I can't seem to get that line out of my head. Mostly because it goes along with the theme of this blog... dreaming big while stuck in reality. Now, don't get me wrong, my reality DOES NOT suck. I am INCREDIBLY BLESSED. I mean, give me a break, I have been able to do and see some pretty amazing things in my 26.5 years on earth. In that, I am also acutely aware that there is so much more for me.

My current work situation...

I work 7:30-2:30 at a local elementary school. Sweet hours eh?! I mean give me a break, I am off of work while most people are just returning from their lunch break. To top it off, I get all federal holidays off, a week at Thanksgiving, two weeks over Christmas and New Years, and a week at Spring break. And the icing on the cake, I get summers off. I know, I know, why the heck would someone want to change that?!?! Simply put, it isn't my dream job. I don't hate it, but I don't love it. It isn't what I am passionate about.

This summer, I got to work at a local concert venue and LOVED every minute of it. I worked in the box office, helped with some special projects, assisted with some VIP parties, and just THRIVED being at a concert venue, doing what I LOVE. When schools started my time at the venue went from daily to show days. I am glad that it didn't have to stop cold-turkey but I often wish that I was driving there for work everyday. I just love it there. By no means is it a perfect place, but I even love it for it's imperfections!

Well, last night was a pretty amazing night for me. It probably won't and doesn't seem like much to some people, but it was HUGE for me and my soul. I was given the opportunity to help out in a new way, a way in which I never thought I would have been able to, at least not at this state in life.

All this to say, my heart is full. I am thankful for people who see my potential. I am thankful for people who believe in me, so much that they put me in positions that show me just how much that believe in me. I am thankful for people that cheer me on and encourage me.

I felt like a geek driving home last night with a big smile on my face knowing that I did a good job. I was nervous, as anyone would be, wanting to do a good job and not let anyone down. Driving home, I smiled because I know that I did well. That felt really good.

All this to say, I often feel like my current work has me living in a "small reality" as there is so much MORE that I want to be doing. BUT... the REALITY is, my reality isn't small at all. It isn't what I want it to look like, but that doesn't make it small. I am going to continue to dream big and wide, even when my reality doesn't necessarily look anything like those dreams; as I learned last night, big dreams can come true even in small realities. :)

Hope that makes sense... I know it kind of rambled on and on, just had to share it.

Dream BIG

Must See

2011-09-16T22:21:00.001-07:00

Today, a dear friend of mine got to see her most favorite artist of all time in a very intimate setting, thanks to another dear friend of mine. Talking with her about her experience reminded me of some of my favorite concert experiences. Here are some of my favorite concert moments to date...

- Rascal Flatts, Carrie Underwood, and Vince Gill at the RYMAN for a taping of the Grand Ole Opry, in Nashville.
- Garth Brooks at The Encore in Las Vegas, just him and his guitar playing through his discography for almost three hours!
- John Mayer at The Hollywood Bowl.
- Lady Antebellum and Tim McGraw at Cricket Amphitheater last summer... standing smack at the end of the catwalk was so much fun!
- Sugarland at Country Thunder in Arizona.
- Sara Bareilles at House of Blues San Diego... or Sara Bareilles anywhere for that matter.
- Jay-Z at The Pearl at The Palms. EVERYONE should see Jay-Z at least once. AMAZING!
- Journey at Pala Casino... Don't stop believin'

Here are some other artists that DID NOT disappoint...
Rod Stewart and Stevie Nicks
Kid Rock
Lil Wayne
Sade
John Legend
Hanson. Go ahead, judge me all you want. They are so damn talented!
Allen Stone. You may not have heard of him yet, but you will VERY soon. TRUST ME!
Marc Broussard... hello SOUL!

The following is a list of artists that I would be BEYOND elated to see LIVE... NEEDS TO HAPPEN!

James Taylor (Preferably with Carole King, but I will take him any way I can get him.)
Celine Dion
Elton John
Garth Brooks (I saw him in Vegas but I would still like to see him do a show with a full band.)
Dixie Chicks (I know, I know... they aren't touring but that doesn't mean they won't someday!)
U2
Ray LaMontagne

Yup, I love me some live music.
It moves me inside.
It makes my soul happy.

Justin Timberlake...

2011-09-14T21:17:00.001-07:00

Please make music again...

Give

2011-09-14T20:57:00.001-07:00

I have watched this over and over again...

Grab a Tissue

2011-09-09T13:15:00.001-07:00

http://kyxy.radio.com/2011/09/07/our-heaven-911-song-just-for-you/

I was driving in my car, heard this, and immediately started weeping.

Kind words...

2011-08-24T08:37:00.000-07:00

This morning, just a few minutes ago actually, I got a Facebook message from a friend that I haven't seen in a while. This is what it said...

So I didn't wanna sound creepy by posting on your facebook, but I was browsing (I don't like the word stalk-now that's creepy) your pictures and wanted to let you know you look so great!!!! you look happy, healthy and so full of life. I know you've been working hard at the gym and I say keep it up cause you can really see a difference, you look absolutely stunning I don't know if you hear it enough but you look great-inside and out. Hope you're doing well and enjoying your day!

I have no words as to what these words do for my heart. This journey to health and healing has been a LONG one, full of lots of twists and turns and bumps in the road. It has been tough. Attainable, but tough. E-mails, text messages, phone calls, and random comments like this keep me going.

There are SO MANY of you that have been encouraging me with words similar to these all along, and I sincerely THANK YOU. Thank you for pushing me forward on this journey.

I know the pain of a heart break...

2011-08-24T07:55:00.001-07:00

Love Story: Part Two

2011-08-03T07:55:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, I posted a link to Donald Miller's blog.

The post was directed at women and was about how to live a great love story.

Today's post is directed at men.

MEN... READ THIS!!

Ladies, you should read it too!

THANK YOU, Don Miller! Thank you!

2011-08-02T13:35:00.000-07:00

Once again, my literary crush brings it home!

Please go read this blog post.

If you are a woman, I BEG of you to read it.

PLEASE.

Now.

Two Bucks!

2011-07-31T22:01:00.000-07:00

If I can afford to give two bucks, anyone can!

Help make this tour happen. You won't regret it!

SO DAMN GOOD!

2011-07-28T20:18:00.000-07:00

I forgot how much I loved this video...

Wishlist

2011-07-28T19:59:00.000-07:00

My current wishlist...

THIS Watch

THIS Bike

THIS Dresser

THIS Chair

1 Month

2011-07-26T20:25:00.000-07:00

I just checked my blog to see when I last posted and I was shocked to see that it had been almost exactly one month! Wow, clearly I have been super busy with this Summer "break".

Here are some photos showing what I have been up to in the last month...

Sierra and Jeff tied the knot!

My sister had her second baby! Sweet Jackson Colin...
I kept running and running and running...
Ron and the Family Merrell came to town!
As I have shared on this blog before, I took in the sweet sounds of Allen Stone at Anthology. (Side not, I went to this show by myself. If you have never taken yourself on a date to a show, DO IT! I bought myself dinner and an overpriced beverage and I loved every minute of it!)
I have spent LOTS of time with my sister, brother-in-law, and nephews. Parker LOVES taking pictures with Tia. :)
A friend's mother lost her battle with Pancreatic Cancer at the beginning of July, so Kira and I flew up to show our support at love for the whole family. While in the Bay Area and Napa, we took in lots of sights. We went to Castillo de Amorosa for some wine tasting and went to the Jelly Belly factory for some tasty treats.
Real Madrid played Chivas at Qualcomm Stadium. Thanks to my sweet friend June, I worked in the box office for the week and a half leading up to the game and then again the day of the game. The promoter was gracious enough to get my Portugal World Cup jacket signed by CHRISTIANO RONALDO!
Maroon 5 and Train kicked off their summer tour at Cricket Amphitheater last Friday! Thanks to Rhonda, Destiny and I were able to take in the sweet sounds from some great seats. Thanks to Kira, Destiny and I got to MEET Maroon 5!
As if meeting Maroon 5 wasn't enough, the next day, Kira took me to a Sophie Lounge with SARA BAREILLES! To top it off, we got to meet her! AMAZING!
Later that night, a group of us went to see Sara Bareilles and Sugarland in concert.
Needless to say, I have been busy. As I have said before...

I don't know whose life I am living, but I hope I don't have to give it back!

OHHHHHH... and a little Weight Watchers update: Last week I lost 3 pounds taking me to 31.4 lost! I am officially over half way to my goal! :)

EXACTLY what I needed

2011-06-27T15:47:00.000-07:00

I was just going through my stationery box to pull some goodies for a letter writing session and I came across a piece of paper that an old co-worker gave to me about two years ago. It was EXACTLY what I needed to read today. EXACTLY!

"Everyone longs to give himself or herself completely to someone, to have a deep and committed soul relationship with another, to be loved thoroughly and unconditionally. But God says:

No, not until you are satisfied, fulfilled and content with being loved by Me alone, with giving yourself totally, unreservedly to Me alone.

I love you, My child, and until you discover that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found, you will not be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another until you are united with Me; exclusively of anyone or anything else; exclusively of any other desires and belongings.

I want you to stop planning, stop wishing and allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing -- one that you can't imagine. I want you to have the very best. Please allow Me to bring it to you.

Just keep your eyes on Me, expecting the greatest things.
Keep experiencing that satisfaction knowing that I AM.
Keep learning and listening to the things I tell you.
You must be patient.
Don't be anxious. Don't worry.
Don't look around at the things others have.
Don't look at the things you think you want.
Just keep looking up to Me, or you will miss what I want to give you.

And then, when you are ready, I will surprise you with a love far more wonderful than you could ever dream. You see, until you are ready, and until the one I have for you is ready (I am working even this minute to have both of you ready at the same time), until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me and the life I have prepared for you, you won't be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me... and this is perfect love."

Reading this immediately made me think of a few pieces of Scripture and of an excerpt from one of my favorite books, SEX GOD.

Habakkuk 1:5
“Look at the nations and watch— and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told."

Jeremiah 29:11-13
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. "

The following is from SEX GOD by Rob Bell:

"You can't be connected with God until you're at peace with who you are. If you're upset that God gave you this body or this life or this family or these circumstances, you will never be able to connect with God in a healthy, thriving, sustainable sort of way. You'll be at odds with your maker. And if you can't come to terms with who you are and the life you've been given, you'll never be able to accept others and how they were made and the lives they've been given. And until you're at peace with God and those around you, you will continue to struggle with your role on the planet, your part to play in the ongoing creation of the universe. You will continue to struggle and resist and fail to connect."

Baby Makin Music

2011-06-27T15:45:00.001-07:00

No exaggeration.

I don't know from experience but I am no dummy.

Allen Stone creates some BABY MAKIN MUSIC!

Listen for yourself...

Told ya so!

Summer Reading List

2011-06-21T15:38:00.001-07:00

Here are the books that I am planning on devouring this summer...

First, I need to finish...
Which by the way, I started on my trip to Seattle in April.

THEN...

I can read these beauties, in no particular order:

I can't wait!

My plan is to finish Angry Conversations tonight or tomorrow morning so I can start on the new ones ASAP!!!

Recently...

2011-06-20T17:22:00.000-07:00

A visit from Ems...

Disneyland on Memorial Day

Parker

Tim McGraw Pre-Show

Cody's Graduation

Festa 2011
Kim and Dave's Wedding Festivities

SUMMER!!

2011-06-20T17:13:00.001-07:00

Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, it is officially summer!!

I know, I know, Summer OFFICIALLY starts tomorrow, but today was the first official day for me. And by that, I mean first day with NOTHING on the agenda. I slept til 8am, which is sleeping in for this gal. I went to a friend's house to get some sun and talk all things wedding for the big day on Saturday. I did whatever I wanted and it felt GOOD!

Here are some of my favorite summer things...

Petco Park
Fresh Squeezed Lemonade
Fireworks
Beach Cruisers
Beach time in Coronado
Del Mar Fair

Natalie Closner does it Again

2011-06-15T06:49:00.001-07:00

So dang talented!

UHMAZING!!!!

2011-06-07T15:24:00.000-07:00

Thank you Katelynn for posting this!

Truth

2011-06-06T16:43:00.000-07:00

I can say, with all the confidence in the world, that this is pure truth.

I have started to live out so much of what this poster says and it has changed my life for the better.

You should too!

Time to save my pennies so I can purchase this poster!!!

*I stole this from LosWhit

YES PLEASE

2011-06-05T10:04:00.000-07:00

Don't act like you don't know the lyrics and love this jam.

American Idol Finale

2011-05-31T20:12:00.001-07:00

Unless you live under a rock or are reading this blog for the first time, you are well aware of the fact that my dear friend Kira has made MANY an amazing things happen for me, and so many more. Kira even has the nickname Jedi. She isn't called Jedi for nothing.

It is also no secret that I love me some American Idol.

You can imagine where this is going...

YES! It is true. I went to the AMERICAN IDOL FINALE!

Once again, Kira worked her magic, and because of her, our friend Kathlene and I got to go to the Nokia Theater last Wednesday to watch the live results show. It was surreal.

Bono and The Edge. Carrie Underwood. Tim McGraw. Gladys Knight. Kirk Franklin. Beyonce. Lady Gaga. Judas Priest. Jack Black. Stephen Tyler. Marc Anthony. Not to mention LAUREN ALAINA and Scotty McCreery. It was a star studded evening!

I still can't believe that I got to be there for it LIVE and in person. I never would have thought that I would have been able to do something like that. And in reality, I probably never would have been able to without Kira working her Light Saber and Jedi tricks to make it happen.

Kira - Thank you, ONCE AGAIN, for being so thoughtful as to make this dream come true. :)

Garden of Eden

2011-05-31T19:49:00.000-07:00

I have had numerous friends join CSA's over the past few years. Joining a CSA is not something that I ever really considered to be for me. This is one instance in which ignorance is anything but bliss.

After just one week with Garden of Eden Organics CSA, I can honestly say that I don't know why I waited so long! If you live in San Diego County, and eat produce... which should be anyone who lives in San Diego County, CHECK THEM OUT! I PROMISE that you won't be disappointed!

The customer service is something to sign up for in itself. The gals working at the drop-off location that I went to were beyond helpful. Being a new comer, I didn't know what to expect and was nervous. I had NOTHING to be nervous about. The gals took their time to show me all that came in my box (which was A LOT) and even took their time to tell me some recipe ideas. The extra care was just the beginning of the wonderful experience.

The produce that came in my box was more than I even could have imagined! Lettuce, cabbage, nectarines, a box of blueberries, strawberries, oro blanco grapefruit, broccoli, curly kale, spinach, carrots, green onions and more! Keep in mind, this is just the SINGLE box!!! I was shocked when I saw just how much produce I would be receiving! Amazing!

I must say, the nectarines were the best nectarines that I have ever had. So juicy, sweet, and just perfect.

All this to say, please check out Garden of Eden Organics.

I am proud to be a member of this CSA and I promise you won't be disappointed if you join.

Weight Watchers Update

2011-05-31T19:46:00.000-07:00

I suppose I should update this tomorrow night since I will be weighing in tomorrow evening.

Oh well.

As of last Wednesday, I was down 26.4 pounds!

I last posted that I was Weight Watcher Cocky. Well, Apparently I wasn't so cocky after all considering I lost 3 pounds that week!!! Last week, I weighed in in the morning since I was unable to weigh in in the evening, and I was down .8 pounds.

On top of being down 26.4 pounds... for the first time in my life, I weigh less than it says on my license. I can't wait to reach goal weight to go get me a new license. :)

Here's to weighing in tomorrow. :)

Weight Watcher Cocky

2011-05-17T20:49:00.001-07:00

Yup, you read it right.

I have become Weight Watcher cocky.

A taste here. A little bite there. I know how many points are in that, I will track it later. Blah Blah Blah. If you have done WW, you know what I am talking about. You may not call it WW Cocky, but that is exactly what it is.

I became acutely aware of this condition about 2 weeks ago when I maintained at weigh-in. I became even more aware last week when I gained .8 (which isn't even a California Burrito). This week, I have tracked every single thing that I have consumed. I even tracked the Ice Cream cone that I got at Disneyland last night. And let me say, that ice cream cone was TOTALLY worth it.

This week is the first time in my 16 weeks of WW that I have used all of my weekly points (over-draft protection) and have even used some of my activity points. I have been ravenous the past few days. Nothing has been satisfying and I feel like I can't stop eating.

Today, I even said these dreaded words...
"I HATE DOING WEIGHT WATCHERS!"

I IMMEDIATELY caught myself and had to give myself a little pep talk. The reality is, I don't hate WW. In fact, I love it. I don't hate WW, I hate that things like Chocolate Chip Cookies and Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches are dangled in front of my face on a daily basis yet are so high in WW point value. I had to remind myself of my goal. I had to remind myself of how far I have come and of how good I feel. I just needed to give myself a little reality check.

So, as I write this, I have gained 5 activity points today and still have 3 of my daily points remaining and am done eating for the day. Clearly, it isn't that hard. :)

I just read a quote that further encouraged and pushed me in this process...

"Giving up something now for something better later is not a sacrifice. It is an investment."

An investment!!!!

I ran...

2011-05-16T08:29:00.001-07:00

...over the San Diego Bay Bridge (The Coronado Bridge) AND I lived to tell about it!

That's right!

Yesterday, Kira, June, Kathlene and I participated in the San Diego Bay Bridge Run/Walk. If you have never done a race of any kind, DO ONE! They are so fun. Trust me! In that, they are even more fun when you do it with some friends.

Kathlene finished first with a time of about 40 minutes.

Then came me, at:
If you don't have super eye-sight, that says 46:52.

I am so proud of myself. I am proud of myself for getting out there and trying. I am proud of myself for finishing in a time better than I had expected. I am proud.

Call me crazy, but I think I have become somewhat of a runner. So much so, that I have decided to train for a 15k! Yes, a 15k!!! 9.3 miles. The 15k will take place on the morning of Fourth of July on Coronado Island, which is one of my ultimate favorite places to be on the Fourth of July! Training starts TODAY. Today, I shall run 2-3 miles. I need to find a good 15k training schedule to help in the process. Anyone have one to recommend?
Anyone wanna join us?

Run fast...

2011-05-14T20:12:00.001-07:00

This is, by far, my favorite song to run to these days.

What is your favorite song to run to?

Wedding Season 2011

2011-05-07T21:36:00.000-07:00

Wedding Season 2011 is quickly approaching.

For the first time, I am not dreading getting in a dress for the occasions. In fact, I am looking forward to going shopping at stores that I was previously unable to shop in. I am looking forward to taking my new found confidence out in a pretty new dress.

I can't help but window shop while I watch Tangled on this lovely Saturday night.

Here is my favorite dress so far...

Oh, Anthropologie, why must you be so lovely?!

Alas, my first wedding isn't until June 18th, so I still have quite a bit of time; and let's be honest, I can't afford this lovely dress from Anthropologie anyway. I am hoping that my tried and true Old Navy or Target has something just as cute but a little bit more in my price range. :)

Work Out Mix: UPDATED

2011-05-04T19:58:00.000-07:00

The following songs make my time at the gym much more enjoyable.

Dog Days are Over - Florence + The Machine
Rolling In The Deep - Adele
Wake Me Up - Charles Kelley
One Step At a Time - Jordin Sparks
Separate Ways - Journey
I Do Not Hook Up - Kelly Clarkson
Stars Tonight - Lady Antebellum
No Reins - Rascal Flatts
Uncharted - Sara Bareilles
Many The Miles - Sara Bareilles
Barton Hollow - The Civil Wars
Check On It - Beyonce
Leavin - Jesse McCartney
Firework - Katy Perry
Raise Your Glass - Pink
Love Like This - Natasha Bedingfield

Last but not least... the ENTIRE Jennifer Hudson record. But, there is a whole post in the making about that so you will read more about that soon. :)

What songs keep you going?

Running from Nothing

2011-05-04T19:46:00.001-07:00

I think I have officially become a runner.

Maybe.

I think.

I never understood how people could just run. Getting on a treadmill to run was never something that appealed to me. In fact, running made me want to throw up, literally and figuratively speaking. I wasn't into it.

Back in February, I got on the treadmill at the gym just to see if I could run a mile without stopping. Much to my surprise, I ran the whole mile and in pretty good time. It felt good. It felt empowering. It started me on this journey of running 3-4 days a week.

Every time I run, I go with the goal of running a 5K. Some days, I finish a mile and am just done. Some days, I run a 5K and still have some energy so I walk some more, get on the elliptical, or ride the bike. As expected, my energy level varies with each day and so does my work out.

Last week, I ran my fastest mile yet. 10:22. It felt incredible!

Today, I ran my fastest 5K yet. 35:35. Again, it felt incredible!

Here is the proof...

So, I think I am a runner.

And...

I don't hate it!

WW Update

2011-05-04T19:40:00.000-07:00

I realize that I haven't given a WW update in a few weeks so I thought I would catch you up to where I am today.

This week, I lost 1.2 pounds taking me to a total weight loss of 23.6 pounds GONE.

Here are some of the things I find myself thinking/saying pretty often...

- I can't believe I have lost over 20 pounds.
- I feel so good already, I can only imagine how good I will feel at my goal.
- If I can do Weight Watchers, anyone can!
- I feel better than I have felt in my adult life.

Cheers the journey!

80's Attire

2011-04-28T12:39:00.000-07:00

I am in need of some 80's fashion wear for the upcoming Silver Gate Auction.

Here are some of the photos that I am looking to for inspiration...

Adorable...

2011-04-22T22:06:00.000-07:00

So dang cute!

Happy Friendaversary!!

2011-04-14T17:07:00.000-07:00

Kind of.
At least we shall celebrate this weekend.

I can't believe it has been a year since these pictures were taken...

Last year, it was The Eagles at The Hollywood Bowl and an impromptu trip to Staples Center to cheer on The Lakers in game one of the first round of the playoffs. Oh, and we can't forget the food trucks in WeHo.

This year, it is Stevie Nicks and Rod Stewart at The Hollywood Bowl and another trip, not so impromptu but very much a surprise, to Staples Center to cheer on The Lakers. Once again, we shall cheer them on in game one of the first round of the playoffs!

Kira - You are an incredible friend and I am so blessed to have you in my life. You are one of the most thoughtful, caring, and generous people I have ever met. You constantly put others ahead of yourself, including me. Thank you for being such an encouragement to me through Weight Watchers. Thank you for allowing me to tag along to so many concerts. Thank you for always inviting me to volunteer at different events with different organizations. Thank you for teaching me and believing in me. Most of all, thank you for being such a great friend. I am so thankful that Freighbor had a birthday. :)

I steal things...

2011-04-12T22:44:00.000-07:00

Namely, quotes and videos from my friends' blogs...

I stole this from Eric.

"Life is short. Break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that made you smile. Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

- Mark Twain

Love Wins

2011-04-08T10:30:00.000-07:00

I am currently sitting at the counter of one of my second homes, Casa Maxin, in Edmonds, Washington. I have been in the Seattle area since last Friday and leave tomorrow night for the warmth and sunshine of San Diego.

While here, I have done a lot of reading. The first book I read was Love Wins, which stirred up A LOT of controversy. I don't want to get into my opinion now, as I will blog about it when I get home, but I will say that I don't get what all the hype was about.

Today, my friend Josh posted this video and I couldn't help but steal it. As Josh said, "This just warmed my heart. Of course, somehow, some of you will still have a problem with it."

WW Update

2011-03-30T21:57:00.000-07:00

Today, I reached another HUGE milestone on this weight loss journey with Weight Watchers.

This week, I lost 4 pounds. That 4 pound loss takes me to a total weight loss of 20.6 pounds! I am more than 1/3 of the way through my journey to losing 60 pounds. When I looked at the scale, I was shocked. I am still shocked.

It is almost crazy how easy this has been. Don't get me wrong, it is HARD. Doing Weight Watchers takes A LOT of planning, determination, and thought. I HAVE to think before I eat or drink. If I don't, I won't be successful. When I say it is crazy how easy it has been, I guess I was expecting for it to take a lot longer to lose 20 pounds. I waited so long to start this journey because I thought it would be this uphill battle that I would try and fail at. I am so glad that I was wrong! I am so glad that I have so many people loving and supporting me through this journey. It takes a village!

To put it into perspective, I have lost MORE than the two pictures show below....

Insane right?!?! I am still in shock. More than 20 pounds!!!!

Emerald City

2011-03-30T11:24:00.000-07:00

I can't wait to spend 9 days taking in all of this and more...

Green Lake

Kerry Park

Snoqualmie Falls

Pike Place Market

Ride the ferry over to Kingston

Gas Works Park

UW... ESPECIALLY with the Cherry Blossoms in Bloom

Opening day at Safeco! If I can't go to Padres Opening Day, The Mariners are the next best!

That is just the beginning... I also want to go to the Chateau Ste. Michelle Winery in Woodinville, run by the canal near SPU and meet Megan for lunch in the SUB for old time's sake, go to the top of the Space Needle, and of course visit some thrift stores. Most of all, I am looking forward to sitting in a Starbucks by a fire with some books that I have been waiting to read!

More than spending time at some of my favorite places in Seattle, I can't wait to see some of my favorite people.

Kimber and Secret Lover

Rodizzle AND I FINALLY get to meet her HUSBAND

Sweet Megs

My favorite person on Sabbatical, Michelle

To top that off, I get to spend time with Mama and Papa Maxin, Heffer, Sunny, The Brothers Hilliard, and others.

Cheers to Spring Break!

Let me be honest...

2011-03-28T22:14:00.000-07:00

...I have been so blessed to experience some of the most exciting and amazing things in my few years of life so far.
...I have the most encouraging and supportive friends in the world.
...I get jealous and sad when I see or hear of friends getting to travel to Europe, especially Ireland.
...I have never had someone say, "Amanda, I have someone I want you to meet!" or "Let's set Amanda up with him.". I know it seems trivial, and it is, but I still wish I would hear those words just once.
...As much as I love traveling and being on the go, there is no bed as good as my own.
...I am learning to stick up for myself, no matter the cost.

If I were being honest...

2011-03-28T22:04:00.000-07:00

...I would talk about how much it hurts to see pictures and hear of my friends' travels through Europe.
...I would share about the pain I feel when I hear of people getting to go to Ireland.
...I would share my fears of what comes next in life.
...I would share my anxiety about how I am going to manage to pay my bills each month.
...I would stop making plans that cost money and get creative when making plans to spend time with friends.
...I would speak up when I feel forgotten or overlooked.
...I would just be myself ALL the time, no matter the perceived cost!

Time to start being honest in all of these ways and more.

I stole this...

2011-03-28T14:53:00.000-07:00

“For as long as you can remember, you have been a pleaser, depending on others to give you an identity. You need not look at that only in a negative way. You wanted to give your heart to others, and you did so quickly and easily. But now you are being asked to let go of all these self-made props and trust that God is enough for you. You must stop being a pleaser and reclaim your identity as a free self.

The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing – not healing, not curing – that is a friend who cares.

Somewhere we know that without silence words lose their meaning, that without listening speaking no longer heals, that without distance closeness cannot cure.”

-Nouwen

I stole this from Anne Jackson, an author and speaker that I love love love.

Taking A Water Break

2011-03-27T09:19:00.001-07:00

A few years ago, some girlfriends and I were hanging out at the APT and we got on the subject of all of the people that we graduated with that are married with baby 1 and even baby 2. One girl said, "we are getting lapped". Another girl chimed in and said, "well, I am on a water break, so I am getting lapped while on that break". We had a good laugh and still talk about it to this day.

So, while I am on my water break, getting lapped, I am enjoying this season of life. I travel, I go to shows, I volunteer with a number of organizations, I go to sporting events... I am living the dream. The water tastes pretty good so I am not sure I am ready to get back to running.

The other day, I got physical reminders of just how many people are lapping me...

Two save the dates and a birth announcement all came on the same day. I couldn't help but laugh when I opened them.

Cheers to my friends that are "lapping" me. I couldn't not be happier for my friends and where life is taking them. One day, it will be my turn to send out save the dates, engagement pictures, shower and wedding invitations, birth announcements and all the others... Some day.

26 sounds more grown up than 25

2011-03-27T09:02:00.000-07:00

I don't know what it is but 26 sounds more grown up than 25 does.

I am excited about 26. I am sure it has a lot to do with the Weight Watchers journey that I am on, but there is more to it than that. For the first time in my life, I feel like the world in my playground. I feel like I can do anything that I put my mind to. Who says I can't chase my dreams? I just feel really good about 26.

I should say, I probably feel this way because I have a community of friends around me that encourage me to feel this way. I can't tell you how many birthday cards had some version of "this is your year" in them. I can't help but believe it.

To celebrate 26, some friends and I made the trek to "The Family Bar" for some food, drinks and Karaoke. It was so much fun. We laughed, sang, and even danced a little. It was perfect.

I am BEYOND blessed by the most incredible, generous, kind, caring, and simply wonderful friends in the world. It's true. They're the best!

Random Facts

2011-03-27T08:24:00.000-07:00

1. I prefer the original Beverly Hills 90210 to the new one, though I am not afraid to admit that I watch both. Don't act like you didn't chant DONNA MARTIN GRADUATES one time or another.

2. I hoard notecards, I can't help but see if there are any on clearance whenever I am at Papyrus or Target. If only stamps weren't so expensive.

3. I have to sleep with a fan on for the white noise. If I don't, I have to fall asleep to music.

4. I have an aversion to Android phones... not sure why, I just do.

5. My books and movies are all organized in alphabetical order.

6. When shopping, I go straight for the clearance section, and even in the clearance section it has to be a good deal in order to make the purchase.

7. If my DVR was an hourly employee, it would get paid very well.

8. Puffs with VICKS is my new favorite kind of tissue.

9. I used to judge people who would work out and then go shopping in their sweaty gym clothes, now I am one of them.

10. I got an amazon.com giftcard for my birthday and immediately ordered Rob Bell's new book. I am waiting to read it until I get on the airplane Friday morning.

11. If Steel Magnolias is on TV, I am watching it and quoting the whole movie.

Weight Watchers Update

2011-03-27T07:34:00.001-07:00

This is long overdue, and I apologize for that.

Needless to say, my days look quite differently than they used to. I go to work, come home and change, then go to the gym for anywhere between 30 minutes and 2 hours. Tuesday nights are full with Community Group, Wednesday nights are full with Weight Watchers weigh-in and meeting, Thursdays are full with friend time. I am tired just writing that out...

I am in the middle of my 9th week of weight watchers. In 8 weeks, I have lost 16.6 pounds, with a loss every week so far. As you can tell, this ain't no Biggest Loser, this is real life. I don't work out 8 hours a day, I don't have a personal chef, and I don't have the luxury of living in a bubble where only organic and healthy foods exist.

My goal is to work out 7 days a week. Most weeks, I work out all 7 days. Some weeks, I only work out 5 or 6, and that is totally ok. In fact, 5 or 6 is still more than enough. I mainly do cardio, either at the gym or going for a run or jog/walk throughout San Diego.

With Weight Watchers, you get a Daily Point Target. This target changes as you become closer to your goal weight but will never go lower than 29 points. I started at 35 and am currently at 32. Along with those daily points, everyone gets 49 anytime points to spend how you would like. I am lucky in the fact that I am not a wino, as lots of people use their points for alcohol. So, you get your daily points, your anytime points, and you even earn points for activity. So, anytime I go to the gym, or for a walk or jog, I earn points based on the length of time and the intensity. As you can tell, we are well fed on Weight Watchers.

I aim for my target everyday, trying to be right at 32 points, but not beating myself up for using some of my anytime points. My goal each week is to use no more than half of the anytime points and none of my activity points. So far, I have been successful in this goal.

Half way through week 9 and am feeling good. :)

Slow and steady wins the race.

I'm Alive

2011-03-18T13:12:00.000-07:00

It has been far too long since I posted on this sucker. Time for some updates!

Here are some posts that I have in the works, they just need to get some pictures and be posted...

1. Weight Watchers update
2. 26 sounds more grown up than 25 does
3. It's a big girl world now, full of big girl things...
4. Still taking a water break and Still getting lapped
5. Spring Break

Needless to say I will be doing some marathon blogging this weekend.

XOXO

A MUST Read...

2011-03-06T20:32:00.000-08:00

If you have read this book for any amount of time, you know that I have an author crush on Donald Miller. I do. It's no secret.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE his books, especially his book A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. Read it. Trust me!

What story are you telling? from Rhetorik Creative on Vimeo.

You can get it at any number of stores... even on Amazon for CHEAP!

DO IT!